Supermodel Kate Moss Swapping Image With Leone Lewis In Record Transfer Deal

Posted by mija on Jul 20, 2008 in News | 0 comments

Supermodel Kate Moss is swapping her image with Pop Star Leone Lewis in a record transfer deal, after Moss announced she was utterly fed up playing the drug-fueled, spoilt, self-piteous, exhibitionist, wild child role.
“It’s time for me to move on,” she explained to a hurriedly organised Press Conference at the London ‘Ritz’ hotel. “I am fed up to the teeth being so typecast and it’s time to spread my wings and try other image roles.”
To a dumbfounded media she continued, “I hate taking drugs. I loathe the bloody things. I am also a teetotaler and find parties utterly tedious and boring. But my image forces me to indulge. If I don’t, my modeling work would dry up.” Adding,”I only went out with that washed up, useless, drug addict musician, Pete Doherty, because my image expected it.” Adding, “I don’t even like rock music, for gawd’s sake!”
The media have speculated for several months that Kate Moss and her image “were not getting on” and experiencing “personal differences.”
“I would like to say on record, right now, that my image and I began divorce proceedings this morning,” she exclaimed.
Simon Cowell, manager of ‘Pop Idol’ winner Leone Lewis and now mega-selling ‘Pop Diva’, has offered Moss a straight image swap in a transfer deal allegedly worth millions.
A music insider commented, “Simon realises Lewis is simply too nice and straight. She needs her image “raunched” up. He thinks Kate’s a perfect match for a new-look sassy Leone.”
It is unclear how company sponsors like fashion house Yves Saint Laurent and cosmetics giant Rimmel will react to this news. Although, British high street chain ‘Topshop’, whom Moss designs for, is happy.
“We are delighted,” said a spokesman. “The public are bored of Kate’s wild child impression; so a new, fresh, clean and straight-laced Leone appearance suits us.”
source: thespoof.com